I love George Carlin
Honesty may be the best policy, but it's important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.
I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
If it's true that our species is alone in the universe, then I'd have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.